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This limbo, where I don't know where I stand with her. I love her. I'm in love with her. In every possible way. I can't help it. I wish I could. But I have no idea how she feels about me. I mean... I never thought I had a chance, never deserved a chance. And then after... when she said she felt something... I thought something would've happened, that things would have changed. But they haven't. I have no idea.She loves me, she loves me not, and I'm all out of petals.And I fight with it the rest of the day. Should I talk to her? But once I do... I'll know, and it has the potential to hurt. A high potential. And I can take physical pain, I can ignore that, but I can't take the emotional pain. I can't fight it. And I'll do anything to avoid it. But I can't keep going like this, my mom's word burrowing deeper into my brain, sowing these pessimistic seeds of doubt. And Carly notices my long looks at her, she senses that I'm almost constantly on the verge of saying something to her. But I. Jason apprehensively unlocked the door to his room and slid it open slightly, just enough to peek out. “Please, Jason, let me in,” I said as I put my hand against the door and lightly pushed. He didn’t offer any resistance and stepped back as I walked in. Walking over to his single bed , which was at the far end of the room, I turned and sat down. Looking back at him, I saw that he had closed the door but did not want to look at me because he was standing with his back towards me. "What do you want, Kate?" he asked, still not looking at me, just staring at the white door in front of him. "To talk. To apologize." "Well, I'm not sure there is anything to apologize for really." "Bullshit! You know there is." "What, ummm, what is there to apologize for?" he asked. I could tell that he was still angry as he turned and faced me. “You have said how you feel about me, and I guess you have a right to feel that way if you want.” "I know that I should have believed you, not any stranger. I.
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