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“Oh, come on, DJ. I’ve heard you sing in the shower, and you’ve got a good voice,” Carrie said as we drove down the highway. “Well, I thank you for thinking that. I just hope everybody else thinks that,” I replied. “The only one that matters is you, Doug. If you think you’ve got a good voice, that’s all that matters. Even if you sucked, you still would sound good to me,” Carrie said. “Thanks, Carrie, I love you too.” ----------When we got to Jerry’s, Eve hugged me and whispered in my ear, “Are you ready?” I whispered back, “I sure as hell hope so.” She smiled and said, “You’ll do fine.” I said to the band as I plugged into Mary’s wireless amp and put on Mary’s headset microphone, “I told Mary about a song I heard on the radio I think you could use. She wanted me to play it for you to see what you think, okay?” That was the cue to Eve. She counted out loud to four, then began to play, her keyboard sounding like an accordion as she played the intro to Maria Elena by the. “Hello Sweetie.”“Hey my love”, she smiled.“Uh, before you come in, there’s something I need to explain to you. And I have no idea how to explain this.”“You usually tell me to just say it like it is.”“Yeah, well, I kinda acquired a new dog...”“Oh, is he cute?”“Err, it’s ... a human dog.”“Okay, now you have me confused.”“Yeah, well, why don’t you take a look? It’s in the living room.”Okay, so I was a coward. You tell me how you tell the girl you love about something like this. She spied through the glass door to the living room.“There is a naked girl in your living room,” she said with confusion.“That’s the dog. See, yesterday...”At this point, Kat recognized Bitch.“Oh, it’s her. You are replacing me?” she asked with tears in her eyes.“What? No, why would I replace you. I love you!”“Yeah, well, now you have the girl you always really wanted.”“No. Okay, I’m sorry that I do such a piss poor job of explaining. Please let me try again.”I told her about the Bitch trying to frame me for.
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