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Who wouldn't be suspicious? Sex and my mother were like cars for geese. She didn't know what sex was, where it came from, or that it was in anyway related to her body. Sex was a sin, end of conversation.Orgasms were a very different fish. I'd hear her screaming every other day or night, projecting all the usual uppercase, extended vowels, regardless if she were alone or with some guy who had talked his way upstairs into her bedroom. (I slept in the living room.) If a man could speak an intelligible sentence she'd spread her legs, which is not as welcoming as it sounds. It kept away a lot of drunks. My mom is more innocent than angels and more fucked than Satan's bride.Yes, yes, I digress and digress again. Get use to it. For such a dumb person, mom is amazingly complex. I didn't realize her true intelligence, though, until she told me one thing on that dull, Sunday afternoon."Charlie, you must think your mother is the dumbest girl in the world." She said, speaking in her usual half. I can’t begin to tell you how frantic that made me. ‘One of our ideas was to have a party with our neighbors. Once everyone had a drink I asked for quiet and began to tell them of Lizzie’s condition. I could hear the gasps as I described what we, but mostly she, had been through. I finished by asking for their help. Several of the wives were home during the day. Would they be willing to keep an eye out for her? I wasn’t at all surprised that everyone volunteered. In spite of that there were still times when she disappeared. A few phone calls brought together a neighborhood posse, all dedicated to finding her and bringing her home safely. ‘Eventually, after about a year, she was spending more time out of it than in. I worried every time I went to work. I wanted to speak with her about what to do, but she…’ I had to stop. I realized that I was bawling, tears flowing down my face. Toni patted my shoulder then rose and walked to the ladies’ room, returning with some wet paper towels.
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