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Drawn by my screech, Katrina came bustling through the door, horrified. I tried to explain what occurred, but she was quite dubious. "A ghost from 'Ghostbusters' attacked you? Why don't you watch good movies?"Good movies? "Bitch," I thought, "I was watching Kurosawa movies before you had your first crush on Steve Guttenberg!" Those are fighting words and to prove it I proceeded to land three little love taps to my baby's chin. Victory was mine! My joyful celebration dance was interrupted by the sound of a fierce pounding on the door.It was Ferlin Adams, the campground despot. "Is everybody ok? I heard screams."Katrina shook her head and began to gloss over the details, explaining I had a nightmare. She continued, "If you're gonna name this place 'Camp Cunnilingus,' I suggest you get used to screams." (He was still woefully in the dark.) "She might even have a concussion. She's using words like "Kurosawa" whatever the Hell that is? (That's right, bitch, keep pushing me. No one, I. Lena stood by her desk drying her eyes with a tissue. When I got to her, she held the damp tissue out for me. As I dried my eyes, she smiled and said, "I don't ever want to go through that again Annie. Perhaps threesomes aren't such a good idea after all."I dropped the tissue in to her wastebin and said, "Maybe not, but I'm afraid I've said yes to Elaine. She's coming Friday evening for the weekend, she says she's dying to meet you." Lena rolled her eyes heavenwards and said,"Oh well, at least she's your girlfriend not mine. And you've had plenty of time to choose her over me, and you haven't, so I don't think it'll be the same problem, do you?"I hugged her again and said, "Absolutely not baby." I tried an American accent which made her smile, "Read my lips, It's you I love and want. It took me a little while to realise but now I'm one hundred percent sure. I love you with all my heart and soul. If it was legal, I'd marry you. You are the only woman I want in my life, now and.
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