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The first year went passably, but finished with a disturbingly tentative feel. I wondered if I was really in love at all, because living and sleeping full time with a man–a man I admired immensely–was not proving emotionally all that satisfying. He was always thoughtful and courteous, not controlling, perfectly willing to do his share and more, but He seemed to have slowly distanced Himself from me. He was more agreeable than thrilling. (In fact, at that time I really had no idea what being thrilled felt like.) I was beginning to feel angry because I missed . . . I didn’t know what, and sometimes had the most awful feeling that I had made a mistake in marrying Him. It wasn’t long before I wasn’t keeping these feelings hidden. I doubt you would find it useful to hear the details of the next stage of our marriage–I hope you and David aren’t starting from the same place we did! It’s enough to say that my insecurity and snippiness pushed His buttons, He became resentful and would turn. Say! Where's Abby? Shouldn't she be here now?" Huh? You don't know? Abby planned to misplace her cathedral map at the main library this morning, and then get lost in the south wing. She's probably wandering around down there right now, asking people for directions. Didn't she tell you?"I sighed. "Oh yeah. I think she tried before breakfast. I was so rushed to make the Prayer opening, I brushed her off." Ah..." More back rubs. "Ilias? Tonight in bed, why don't you take some extra time to notice Abby, pet her, make love to you if you can. I think she would really like that."I wiggled under the pleasure of the massage. "You sure Sheffie? It's your turn tonight, and with all the work going on, I've been neglecting you and Michal as much as Abby."The back-rub continued, but Sheffie also bent her head down to my butt and gave me a quick sharp nip with her teeth. I blinked in surprise. "Yeooow! Is there much blood?"Sheffie laughed, playfully ignoring my protest and massaging my butt where.
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