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" Well, It started because I was abused sexually at seven years old. Thisabuse lasted two years, and at the end of it, my identity was totallyshaken. Added to the loss of my father to suicide two years earlier, andgetting as a stepfather an abusive alchoholic, and my connection tobeing a male all but totally destroyed." And then what happened?" Well, when I was thirteen, I became a christian, and was lucky enough toget involved with a conservative Christian church which help counter themessages I was getting from my environment. But sadly, my strugglescontinued." You describe in your book about a 'seemingly never-ending cycle ofindulgence followed by repentance." Yes, sadly, my struggles continued right into my forties. By that point,I had been married, had a child, but lost them because my strugglescaused me to have a breakdown." Then you decided to, as you put it 'stop struggling against my desires,and embrace them.', right?" Yes. I started dressing up more, to start with. I then. It was about two weeks after she had split with her husband following seven years of pointless cohabitation. “Mum,” as she had always referred to her mother-in-law Victoria, had actually increased the frequency of her visits since the break-up. Ostentatiously coming to, “See how her dear daughter-in-law is doing,” but the way she snooped made it plain she wanted to check on what Maegan was doing rather than her state of mind following the break-up. ’Mum’, had always poked her nose in and Maegan had become quite used to her none too veiled criticisms of her less-than-perfect housekeeping but on that particular day she pushed further by saying as she passed through the lounge, “Oh Maegan dear, this shelf is filthy!” Almost anyone else would have responded that the blooming shelf was almost spotless or countered that it was as good as she could do given the busy career she had to get on with. Maegan didn’t however, and just went to the kitchen and got some cleaning things. Horror of.
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