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”I interrupted and said, “Don’t be upset about that, honey. It doesn’t bother me that you were there and saw those things. We’ve led a pretty sheltered life, but seeing that stuff couldn’t really hurt could it?”Sue looked at me with tears in her eyes and continued, “The things she was passing around are called dildos. They were all sizes, shapes, and colors of fake men’s penises. You know that I have never even seen a penis other than yours and some of those were really big. Most are at least seven inches long and thick, but a few are a lot bigger. Sharon said that all of them are molded from real model’s penises. I couldn’t believe that men have penises that large.”I was really getting excited by that turn of events and interrupted again and said, “That’s okay, honey. I’m not upset that you saw those fake penises. I don’t see why that would upset you so much.”Sue sobbed again and continued, “I’m just about to tell you the worst part. One of the dildos she passed to me is a. "You can't trust me, but what's the favor?" Margie is arranging a big party for Saturday Night," What has that to do with me?" I asked."She wants to invite you, but she knew she should check with your pimp first." I could hear the smile in her voice."I'm going to do my hair Saturday," I replied."Do it earlier in the day. It won't take five minutes to do your hair anyway." That was just plain mean," I said, pretending to be hurt."Look, Bitch, can I count on you or not?" She paused a moment, then continued, "So how was that for a pimp holler?" Not very convincing," I replied, smiling."It would be to anyone else. I have big, old, hairy men back up when I talk like that to them." Yeah, they back up to get a running start to kick your ass," I said, smiling again. It was a shame she couldn't see me."Well, it does work sometimes." Yeah, if Jerry and Blevins are behind you," I commented. "Seriously, why do you need me for a party?" It's a girlie party, and we don't have a girlie informant.".
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