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I was early. I knew I would be. I always liked to just sit alone for a while before an important meeting, just to savor the moment and take in the feel of the place, the smell and the sound. I hardly ever used that time to read papers or prepare myself with pertinent information. I just sat and stared — taking in even the tiniest fleck that danced in the lamplight.I had no idea how it worked, but when the meeting started, I was always the most relaxed person in the room. Maybe I just "owned" the place more than the others. It felt as if it were my turf, I guess.But this time my brain refused to empty itself. Too much had happened. And too much depended on the next few hours.That evening on our way down from Rhode Island to New York we never stopped — other than to fill the tank with gas and to buy some junk food.The girls had huddled up in the back seat. They talked, their voices were too low for me to understand. At times I thought I heard sobbing. Later it seemed like giggling. When. After we'd both graduated from college, we realized that we were both undereducated in our chosen fields. Our local college was really only a junior college and if we wanted to make it somewhere other than our small town, we both needed more education. An easy way to get the money for that was to enlist. At first I was going to be the only one doing it. But Julie signed up the same day I did. She said she loved me too much to be away from me for 24 months, and we both ended up stationed together in Florida. We were never in the same platoon, but we were lucky and ended up doing basic training in the same base.It was the worst six months of my life. I called or texted Julie almost hourly. It was so hard seeing her everyday and being within a few feet of her but unable to touch her. We had gotten married halfway through college, and after two years of regular sex with the woman I loved, six months of only sleeping with her while we were on a weekend pass, or an evening pass, was hell..
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