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” I too was fascinated by the way he was examining me and I thought of Lorraine and saw in my mind the same way we both scrutinised each others bodies. I often wondered if a man could see and feel the same things as I do. And I think they do.Once my panties were removed he carried out the usual ritual of putting them to his face and taking in my sweet aroma. I took them from him and did the same. Closing my eyes I thought of her…Lorraine, my sweet Lorraine.“I never saw you do that before,” he said. “That essence of sexual desire is so powerful.” I was taking in that essence and my mind was drifting away to the times that Lorraine and I made love and I almost forgot where I was and who I was with.“Oh yes…it’s so good.” I moaned my reply. Then I opened my eyes and came back to reality, looking at Dave grinning at me. “What?” I asked.“You never fail to amaze me babe. I have known you for months and yet I’m still learning about you and every time we are together I discover something. It was not out of any desire for knowledge or because I was smart either. It was simply a way to escape the guilt. I hardly remember anything from school after that." The day the twins came home I promised myself I would not hurt anyone again. Starting with them. I am not sure I made good on that promise or not but, I did not let their past influence how I treated them. Best thing I could do I thought would be to disappear. Cannot hurt anyone if they don't know you. I graduated valedictorian a year early and immediately left for college. Not sure if you paid attention to me enough to even know though. I have been studding ever since still just trying to forget the horrible things I did to you and our family. I do not ask for your forgiveness nor would I expect it," Newlyn concluded head down.There was a long silence before Juliana said, "thank you for telling me, Newlyn."And for the second time that day Newlyn actually allowed himself a small smile. He had done it. He was not proud.
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