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'Who is that young woman?''That is Roma Jones, our junior lab assistant. She joined us in September, Headmaster.''Perhaps it is time we ensured that she took part in more extracurricular activities? Send her to see me, Mr. Wilson.''Yes, Headmaster.'The next day, at 4.15, Miss Jones knocked on the Headmaster's door.'Come in, Miss Jones. Shut the door, take a seat.''Thank you, Sir. What can I do for you, Sir?''Miss Jones, I pride this school on hiring staff who contribute not only to formal duties but in other ways too. I thought we could explore how you could contribute in a novel way.''Yes sir, did you have anything in mind?''Yes, I thought you could contribute to helping to run a truly 21st-century sex education class for our teenagers.'Miss Jones blushed, then said: 'I am very shy sir, that is why I am a lab assistant.''But you are clearly very attractive, I am sure you have had a normal experience of sex from a first kiss to adult experimentation.''I married my first boyfriend,. And I always felt like she was looking down her nose at me.You could have told me that when she was only a sophomore in college she’d end up getting knocked up by her boyfriend and I wouldn’t have believed you. I would have laughed at you. In fact, when I first heard that I didn’t believe it. And I did laugh. But she eventually called me, personally, and confirmed the rumor. I was polite. I was sympathetic. But inside I was laughing. Harsh. I know. But Ms. Goodie-Goodie finally proving to our family that she was human was a breath of fresh air. Now she was down on my level. And then she had to go and do it. She announced that she and her doofus boyfriend were getting married. Of course they were. That was the only thing Ms. Squeaky-Clean could do. I’m sorry ... MRS. Squeaky-Clean.My aunt “Shelly” was in the same boat as I was. She couldn’t stand Emily’s haughty attitude. Aunt Shelly was a lot more like me. Adventurous. Typically up to no good. Ya’ know? Fun! We decided we were going.
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