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I, uh- I received a report submitted by one ofthe scouts last night, sir." The short man in the horn-rim glassespulled a piece of paper out of his satchel and handed it to thepresident, who read it as Walter spoke. "The last town before the coastgoes by the name of Parkside, sir. Population of somewhere between 800to 900 people." Founded 80 years ago," the president mumbled. "Minor craft exportswith neighboring villages, yadda-yadda-yadda..." The president sighedand handed Walter back the paper. "This is very minor stuff, Walter,"he said, mildly disappointed. "I thought you would have somethingimportant."Walter grimaced. "...I do, sir. As it turns out, Parkside is also hometo a witch."This caught the president's attention. He turned in his seat and facedhis secretary directly. "A witch!" Yes, sir. Specifically, the Metal Witch of New England, sir. A.k.a.,the Metal Mistress of New England, a.k.a., the Metal Mistress." Oh, my!" The president turned back to the admiral. . The last time I used that excuse, it was a physical crisis. This time, the crisis was pure emotion. I was about ten minutes late to class, but I could make that up. I sat up straight and participated just like always. By the end of the day, I was almost rational. I said almost and that's bragging.Charlene insisted on coming home to be with me and I welcomed her. First, she brushed my hair, which was always comforting. She always knew. Then, she was hugging me when my phone rang. I couldn't face talking to him, so I asked Charlene to take it while I went to the bathroom.When I came out, she said, "He saw you in the cafeteria and tried to talk to you in the hall. You wouldn't talk to him. He wants you to listen to him for two minutes and then if you still hate him, he won't bother you anymore."My Dad said that if you stub one of your toes, it doesn't hurt twice as much if you stub two at the same time. I had two toes hurting badly. "How could I hate him? I'm the sucker. I was crazy.
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