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Monica had mixed emotions about what had just happened and was glad that he then took her straight home. When he let her out he told her how good she had done and that he looked forward to seeing her the next day at school. Bill was very excited hearing Monica tell about her first sex and asked her to tell him more about what happened after that. Monica continued that that night she stayed up almost all night looking up sex on the computer. She found thousands of fuck and suck pictures and sex stories but she also found information about having sex. She had heard from other girls and she also found on the computer that the first time she had to have her cherry popped. She had rubbed herself between the legs before and she enjoyed it but that night she inserted a hairbrush handle in her pussy. When she came to the resistance she pushed hard and popped her own cherry. It hurt and she bled but it was not as bad as she had expected. She finally went to sleep. Bill was very disappointed. ...." And then I started to cry."Now, now! It's alright. I can imagine it is confusing to you to live insuch feminine surroundings without any male influence. And don't makeyourself all upset because you are curious. It is natural to wonder aboutsuch things," She was being so nice and understanding that I just wantedto tell her that I wanted to be her daughter instead of her son.....but Icouldn't bring myself to say anything else at all."Would you like me to get you some makeup so that you can see how youlook all done up?" This was the question I had longed to hear coming fromher lips, but I was torn between wanting to be like a 'normal' boy and agirlie boy."I don't know, mother. I guess it is foolish of me to think of suchthings.....but I can't help it." I could feel my inner feelings coming tothe surface and this made me very frightened."Well, I don't see any harm in playing a pretend game so that you can seehow girls do it. I tell you what....I was planning on taking a day from.
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