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Today was a new day, a day of new experiences, dreams anddesires. The days of furtive fumbling, quick passion, stolen orgasmswere over and my true desires were to be allowed their full reign offulfilment. I could not yet understand them, or the compulsion, but Idid not ever remember any time that I did not have them. From an earlychildhood I had felt these sensuous feelings about feminine garments andfeminine things in general. Lately I had even had disturbing thoughtsabout another side of me that frightened me acutely. I was becomingattracted to my own sex, generic sex of course. While still at boardingschool last year, before mother moved me to a new day school when wecame to London, I had seen two boys in the shower room late one night.The sight had at first shocked me, though it had not repelled me, andnow and then, as I dreamily stroked myself while dressed en-femme, Isometimes dreamed not of some beautiful woman doing that to me, but ayoung, androgynous looking, slim man who. Satisfied, our bodies weary, we lay together, neither of us moving. We were like that at sunrise. Being in each other’s arms watching the sun rise was amazing. Even more amazing, Myra came back to my apartment and stayed the rest of the weekend while we indulged in every kind of sexual position known to woman.~~~~~~~Myra was still considering various job offers from around the country when I asked her to move in with me. I believed we could have a good life together and I hoped our love was strong enough to keep her with me. But I also knew she had to chose the best nursing position open to her.If it came to a crunch, I thought I could move with Myra but I had an established business here in California. St Judes hospital is a big children’s cancer hospital but it was her decision to make. Truthfully, I thought I would follow her anywhere — if she wanted me.A little over two weeks later, we ordered take-in food and after eating we settled down with glasses of wine. Then Myra talked.
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