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When my friends and family learn the truth about me, I can start wearing pink girlie outfits with the shoes and forever leave behind the male clothing that I hate to wear. As I said I am blind and have been all my life. However, I do live alone, I am self employed and very independent. About the only thing I can't do is drive and as the effeminate partner in a same sex relationship, I would prefer my boyfriend do all the driving anyway. The man who makes me his will be the one I get my ears pierced for, the one I get breast implants for. When I meet that man, I'll begin hormone replacement therapy and have my body hair permanently removed via electrolysis. I would eventually like to have my penis and scrotum removed, only a small opening for urination left. I already sit down to pee because it makes me happy. I'd love to have to sit to pee pee because I must. I will not seek vaginal surgery because I love the pleasure of wearing 9 inch dildos inside me and know I will absolutely. But there was one day I was taking a hard pounding from him and biting down on his balled up dirty socks or underwear and suddenly realized I was not overwhelmed by the feeling pain, but a different, intense feeling. Indescribable. And I realized that I was rock hard. I still wince every time Matt enters me, even after all this time. The feeling I get when his large cockhead breaks through the narrow part of my boipussy always reminds me of my first time, but I have learned to control the panic feeling as if my world would be split into two. We never really talked about sex much, although I did ask him once why he wanted to fuck me. He told me that I sucked his cock, and I was definitely a faggot and all faggots take it up the ass. He needed to fuck all the time and I was available. Simple as that. I think about all this stuff a lot, but maybe it was truly that simple. I had thought the way he fucked me the first time was almost cruel, but he is a straight guy, and although he knew.
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