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Just to be sure, I read the instructions on the canning jars, and found that, in an attempt to protect itself from lawsuits and to please some anonymous department regulating our safety, the list of warnings, cautions and dangers was so long I almost put the tomatoes on the compost heap and went to the store for cans of the stuff. Danger: Jars are hot. Caution: Glass breaks. Warning: This pressure cooker could blow up.But being an all American boy/girl I patriotically decided to throw away the warnings and do it like I always had done. Meanwhile, while the jars were in the canner, I started to build the shelves that they would be stored on. I picked up the hammer and was warned to wear goggles and gloves to protect myself. The drill warned me not to touch the bit when moving and to wear goggles and secure loose objects like ties and long hair. The saw warned... well you get the idea. I couldn't stand it and escaped as only a true TV can - I ran into the bedroom and got dressed.At. As I came out he approached me and handed me a pen and paper "Give me your number, I'll call you" he said. As I wrote he leaned close and whispered "Next time, I want you shaved and clean" When I handed him the paper he handed me a bag, turned, and walked away. I drove home in a daze. I spent all week waiting on his call, finally on Thursday night the phone rang "Mike?" he asked. I stammered "Yes". "9:30 in the morning at the store" he said and hung up. I showered and then very carefully shaved my pubes and butt. I found the bag with the enema kit in it, read the directions and set it in the bathroom for the morning. When I got there the first thing I noticed was that the store was closed. As I parked I saw the clerk inside so I got out and approached the door. He unlocked it, let me in, and then locked it behind me. Dennis walked from the back and introduced me to the clerk, Keith. Keith was about 30, short (about 5'5") with brown hair, a bit of a gut and a mustache. Dennis is a.
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