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It's kind of like one of those vacations to an obscure little Pacific island. Once there it's Paradise, but getting there is a royal pain in the ass, or in my case in the chest.When you're dead, there is no more pain, and that's a good thing. The flip side is there isn't much in the way of physical sensation of the pleasurable kind either. What you have is your mind, your thoughts, your emotions. Those go on in full cinematic glory, no escaping. In a sense it's even worse than being alive because the living have their body to counterbalance their emotional side, provide sensation to add to awareness, even if it's just a hiccup or a fart.My first manifestation was like a gathering of dust motes, tiny bits of my thoughts and feelings accreting into a cohesive whole, as in a body. Have you ever woken slowly, your senses coming online one by one? It's like that, like coming up from some unknown depth into the light of awareness. An old sodden dead log floating to the surface.I became. I love my body, I always have. I remember the first time I really looked at myself in the mirror. I was very young and I thought I was really cute. I remember thinking that was a little weird but I did like myself and I didn’t see a problem with that. My hair was blonde and shoulder length and my face was perfect. So many of the other kids had issues with their hair, their face, or other parts of their body. I didn’t, I thought I was perfect.Not much has changed. My hair is still blonde but now hangs down to the middle of my chest. I normally wear it in a ponytail and I love wearing baseball caps. It seems that is a very popular look with the guys. I was very skinny as a child but I started to fill out around my freshman year in high school and now I have beautiful boobs and a very pretty butt. My boobs are officially 36C but I am still a relatively small girl (5’4”) so they look even bigger on my small frame. My ass is tight and fills out my pants very nicely and my.
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