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I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it.I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and...HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. WHAT THE... !!!I'm pretty sure Hulk Hogan ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs! The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.Note:If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a Tazer,one note of caution:There is NO such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it. ..Hello, mother. Hello, sister.Decided to wait up for me?Were you worried? I mean, when I told you about the boy who forced me to godown on him, you laughed, then you forced me to wear girl's clothes and goout with another boy, so its a little hard for me to believe you wereworried.Ah, I see, you were hoping I'd share how my night went with James?All right, all right. I'll dish.When I saw him, I feared the worst. I mean, the man is huge! He could snapme like a twig if I tried to put up a fight, so I tried to steal myself forwhatever degrading thing he was going to ask me to do.But first, he took me to an expensive restaurant, and he even pulled out mychair for me!Didn't make me feel much better. I just figured he was going to act properin public, but once he got me alone ...Don't rush me!After a lovely meal where I actually managed to relax enough to hold up myend of a conversation, he took me to a movie.Yeah, that one. The "date movie" of the year, I think they're calling it.So I'm.
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