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Then, out of the blue, he asks to be my friend on Facebook. Turns out we live one neighborhood apart. I’m in this wanna-be poshy neighborhood where the young, hip, rich and gorgeous live. Trouble is I’m too old to be “young,” I’ve never been hip, I’ve got too goddamn much student debt to be rich and I’ve never been considered gorgeous. So I don’t exactly fit in, but I found a house I really liked and I bought it. Bobby lived about a half-mile from me, but it was like crossing the border. The hip, young, and pretty gave way to old, tired and downtrodden. Where there was a new coffee shop going up on every corner in my district, in this one some old Korean guy owned the local grocery. The place usually got by through the alcohol sales – legal and illicit. But Bobby was happy. That’s what he told me when he invited me over to meet his family. And it was a good, even great, reunion. His wife Heather was this cute little fireplug of a woman. She wore a loose fitting top that showed off. Let's go down to theresidency office and make the change," Dick barks at me."For what? You know that they'll just have us fill out a hundred formsthen put us on a waiting list for the next semester. What's done isdone. Let's just deal with what we have now and appreciate that we'reneighbors," but I know that I'm just talking to a wall. Logic doesn'treally suit my friend. He's fun to play with, but he has a penchant forgetting us into trouble by not thinking through things before acting."Whatever, brah! At least your roommate doesn't look like he can rapeyou in the middle of the night. Enjoy your time with fag-boy," hesneers as I see his head leave the doorway."Like I said, stop being a dick and deal with it!" I shout down thehallway."Pussy!" his voice echoes down the hall."Look, I'm sorry about that. He really is a great guy even though Iknow you don't believe me right now," I apologize."Johnelle," he says with a lisp, "My name is Johnelle," he states whileextending his.
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