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I admired her courage. She blamed no one but herself and knew it was a sickness. She dealt with it.I had no such excuse for my behavior. I was selfish. It all boiled down to that. It was always about what I wanted. I had been blind to it just as Ginny had been blind to her alcoholism. Howard's harsh words had jolted me and forced me to admit to my self-centered behavior. But I could change. I knew I could change. It wouldn't even be hard. I'd just have to be more thoughtful of others. I could do that. I would do that.When we finished the dishes, we walked to the living room and sat where we had sat on Wednesday evening. It was my turn. How to begin? I took a deep breath."Howard ... I want first to apologize. I want to apologize for hurting you and for being so stupid as to think you would accept my ... intended behavior. I don't know what I was thinking, but it wasn't rational. Worse than that, I don't know what brought it on. It certainly wasn't you. I have never for a moment. You look handsome she said as she greeted me. You ready to go? Yes I said, you look amazing. Why thank you my dear, she replied as we walked to the garage. We got in her car and headed to the country club. When we pulled up to the main entrance two men in suits opened the doors for us and one of the parked the car. We went inside and found a table. We chatted as other guests arrived, and finally we heard uncle Jim’s distinctive voice. Good you made it he said as he sat down. He didn’t even say hello or comment on how good his beautiful wife looked. Instead he ordered a drink. Aunt Kate and I sat quietly as uncle Jim talked to the other people at the table. Eventually the food was severed and while aunt Kate and I ate our meals uncle Jim ordered several more cocktails and was become a bit tipsy. After dinner uncle Jim had made his way to the bar where he continued pounding down the drinks and talking to friends. Aunt Kate finally looked at me and said, you ready to.
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