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When they came for me I lay down on the trolley bed noticing my paintedtoe nails poking out from the bottom of the blanket they had hastilythrown over me. The hint of glamour in the otherwise unglamorous settingbrought a smile to my face.In the operating room, all the personnel were very friendly towards me,checking that I was okay until eventually it came time for me to gounder. As the anaesthetist placed the mask over my mouth and I breatheddeeply, the world around me began to fade, and then I was gone.=#=I have no idea how long I was under or how long the operation took, butwhen I woke I was back in my room and my body hurt around the chest andwaist and my face tingled. I tried to sit up in the bed, but found thatuncomfortable and just lay there wondering what had happened. I suddenlyhad a scary thought and groped underneath the blanket to my groin.Placing my hand over the front of my panties, I was relieved to feel thatI still had my thingy although under the robe my body was. A fun game for sure, one that would teach her a lessonshe would never forget, but in that fitting room, just for a flaringsecond, I had been ready to hurt her.And it wasn't her fault. While not entirely innocent, she had stumbledinto a world she could have no comprehension of, people with historiesshe couldn't even begin to understand.I started to relax. I had to be careful around Stephanie. She was myfirst in-person client in around a year.......My first after I had beenraped by a man who had convinced me he was a submissive. How had I beenso foolish?But he had built a relationship with me. Played a role, developed trust.I started to unbutton my blouse. That horrible scar-No, the reasonable voice in my mind said. And my fingers stopped on thebuttons. I didn't look down. You don't need to see it every day. Youdon't need to constantly remind yourself of what he did. Every time youdwell on that scar he's hurting you again.7/After a few minutes I settled down and left the cubicle. I then.
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