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"What is your name?" Samuel Gooden." Sam or Samuel." Most people call me Sam." OK, Sam. We need to find something for you to do. Technology does not work here, computer skills are useless. Do you have any hobbies or other skills?"He looked at Bill with doubt in his eyes. "Yesterday you were going to cut my fingers off, and now you're trying to find me a job. What am I missing?" That we believe you. We are a small community, so there ain't no such thing as a free lunch here. We need to find something for you to do to make a living. Did you have any hobbies?" I was raised on a farm. I love to garden." Excellent," exclaimed Ada. "We can always use another farmer." Well, I guess the queen's chief advisor has spoken, and I agree. I am sorry for the rough guy treatment. Can we get past that?" Bill offered my hand.Sam took the offered hand. "You had to do what you had to do. I did point a spear at you after all." Good. Now, how do we get Sam started on his new life?" That's it? You accept. Do your damn job! And you tell me what I have to do to help you. And that’s my job, to help you!”I set the mike back in the mount and looked out at the others. Some of the people there had stunned looks on their faces, but others were nodding and whispering to each other. Then we took a vote.I was the new Majority Whip.I suspect that when the news got to the White House that for the next two years when they asked to see the Congressional leadership, they would be seeing my smiling face went over like a lead balloon. In fact, a few people asked if I would shake his hand, and suggested I take some hand sanitizer for when I did. I smiled and laughed with them, but that would be ballsy, even for me. I would behave myself, or Marilyn would smack me, I’m sure.At Christmas, we did the usual and flew up to Marilyn’s family for a few days. Everybody had heard about my promotion, and I spent a fair bit explaining to my brothers- and sisters-in-law what the job was, or at least what I thought.
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