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But I felt all better now. But things had somehow changed. Rick acted funny around me. I felt a distance between us, hard to put my finger on it, that wasn't there before. Justin was living with some chick he met at a bar and he'd stop by once and awhile to say hi. Rick would still be with him most of the time and they'd still go out some weekends and get drunk. That would leave me alone in the apartment with my music and movies. I was very lonely.One saturday night while Rick was out, I felt particularly lonely. I was listening to my Chris Isaak cds. And I had a glass of wine and decided to finally have a hit of the joint Linda had given me one day. I hadn't smoked any in years but I felt I needed some mind altering substance tonight. I guess I was really down.I lit my candles, put my music on, had my wine and lit up. The first puff was very strong. I started coughing. So I took 2 or 3 little hits after that and that was enough! It was strong stuff, not like the stuff that was out. I felt the shame overwhelm me. A minute ago I hadn't cared who knew I was nothing more than a cocksucking slut, but now, my frenzy calmed by having just cum, I was scared, embarrassed, humiliated. I didn't say anything just felt myself wondering how I had gotten in this position. "When did you turn into a tranny bitch?" Mihir asked with a chuckle in his voice. I again didn't respond. I dropped my hands to my sides and looked at the floor, wishing it would open up and swallow me. Swallow me like I had swallowed the man's cum a minute ago."I asked you a question faggot," Mihir said, "answer me." I am not a faggot." I protested.Laughing Mihir said, "Not a faggot? Give me a break. I just watched you suck cock and cum when that man came all over you. If that is not a sissy cocksucking tranny faggot, what is?"I remained silent, praying this would all go away. I had never felt so shamed in my life. I knew that Mihir would tell everyone what he had seen and that my life would be over as I.
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