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I now needed to know! Memories I'd either forgotten or had repressed were now stuck in my mind, looping endless and I needed to know if what I was recalling was true ... or if I was now starting to go mad as well!We made final confirmations for the meeting at a decent roadside diner just on the New York side of Edison, New Jersey. She lived about a half hour away further west in Somerville, so the drive there was about equally convenient for us both. Now, with growing apprehension, I just prayed that Maureen would actually show up.Maureen hadn't wanted to come, but she had. I recognized her instantly even though I'd never even seen a photo of her. She resembled exactly to a 'T' my preexisting mental image of her that I'd formed from the basis of our phone conversations. I was expecting a mousy plain-ish sort of woman closer in actual age to forty than thirty-five, but her appearance would project to be at least five years older. Probably the sort of woman who never wore makeup, never. The ConversationOne night, we split a nice pre-rolled joint from the dispensary down the street from her apartment. We were in that post-coitus bliss, sitting on her nineteenth story balcony overlooking San Diego Bay, weed and beers in hand. Finally, I spoke up.“My pregnant wife was killed in a drunk-driving accident a few months before I moved out here.”Angelica remained expressionless, but turned her eyes from the bay to my face. “I haven’t really thought about it much. I’ve tried to block everything out as best I can. But all the partying and sex and working will never heal me. I’m really, really fucked up inside.”Angelica didn’t say a word. She sat there, looking at me. When I finally had enough courage to meet her gaze, I saw she had two single wet streaks going down each cheek. Then I lost it. I started silently sobbing, covering my face with my hands and letting out months of suppressed emotion. Suddenly, I felt the warmth I hadn’t felt since Victoria. Angelica.
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