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There's no real purpose for them other than to look cool since you don't often comb your side-swept bangs out of your face. Well, other than the occasional convenience to you there isn't any other purpose. You really just want to impress and intimidate people before they find out how dorky you are.Only moments ago you received a call from your friend, Roseanne Jackson, or Roz as she prefers to be called. It's actually very rare that she dials your number in favor of just walking into your house unannounced, so when you heard her voice on the other line you could only presume that it was something serious she needed your help with. As you pet one of your two cats, Lagoon, she described to you that she had a stomach virus and asked you to help watch over her because you're her closest friend. You try to imagine it that way because all she actually told you was "Stomach virus. Get your pretentious ass over here and be my mother for a couple days." She never really had a way with words,. "He's cute," I said to no one in particular. "What's his name?"Teddi looked at me curiously. "I thought Bobbi ended in an 'i'." It does," I replied in confusion. "What does that have to do withanything?" Well, Bobbi, I don't know if I should ask. My parents and the teachersget awfully mad if I ask. They say it not PC."Now I was completely bewildered. I knew what PC was, of course. Whodidn't? "Teddi, you're confusing me. I have no idea what you're talkingabout."She thought for a while. "I tell you what. Do these words mean anythingto you: Fictionmania, Crystal's, Big Closet, Sapphire's" Yes! I've heard of all of them. My parents go there all the time on theInternet! How did you know?" Well," she said, looking down briefly, "I guess I can take a chance.See, Bobbi, All of us here used to be guys. We're watching the gamebecause we can't play basketball in these cute little skirts and frilly-assed dresses. Usually it's a dead give-away when we find a girl with aboy's name with an 'i' at.
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