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She told me that she’s not dead and that she wants to start living again.’ ‘That is good news anyway, but how in the Hell did you two wind up in bed together?’ ‘That’s kind of a long story but actually the only thing we did was that she gave me an incredible blow job and then we fell asl**p in each others arms. Then you found us this morning.’ ‘Incredible huh? The best you ever had?’ Shit! This could be trouble. I didn’t want to lie to her but I wasn’t sure how she would react. I decided the truth was the best way to handle it. ‘Well……. Actually…….. I have to be truthful with you, right?’ ‘That’s always the smart idea.’ ‘Ok then, yes it was the best I have ever had. By far and away!’ Why the Hell did I have to add that last part in? I’m such an idiot sometimes. ‘Oh really? So do you think granny could give me some pointers?’ ‘I…..I……I…… Guess she probably could, but what I want to make sure of is are we ok? Do you still love me and want to stay with me now?’ ‘Of course I love. Our hands gesturing to an imaginary glass about three feet tall. Then two ice cold one litre (or maybe bigger) glass jugs would appear on the table; probably at a horrendously inflated price. But anyone who can remember Italian money back then will know that everything was priced in what seemed like hundreds of thousand of Liras.Vince, the bloke I was travelling with, and I were attempting — pretty unsuccessfully, I think — to chat up two Swiss - or maybe they were German — women who were sitting on the next table. Vince, regretfully didn't have the same bullshitting talents as Joe when it came to women, maybe that's why he was still single at thirty-five.Anyway we weren't really watching what was going on around us. So when someone asked, "Would you be so kind as to take a photograph for us?" In a vaguely familiar American accent, it was with some surprise that I realised the question was directed at me.I turned around to see who had made the request and was completely gobsmacked to.
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