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And the worst part is I completely deserveto feel this way.I moped my way through the next couple of days. I didn't leave my room unless Ihad to. Karen and Donna were as supportive as they could be. (Apparently Donnahad told Karen what was up.) I know their hearts were in the right place buttheir constant belittling of Jake wasn't exactly making me feel any better. Icame to realize that there was no one I could really talk to about this. No onewould be able to say anything that would make me feel better, with out me comingclean about who I truly was. That would, of course, be a one way ticket to anice tight fitting jacket and a lovely padded room. Nope I was going to have towork this one out on my own.I woke up at about 2AM from a whopper of a nightmare. I'd been having one justabout every night since my conversation with Paul. I got up to go to thebathroom. As I got out of bed I noticed that I felt wet down there already."Wonderful. Now I've regressed to bed wetting." I thought to. . for any reasons.”“It’s okay. You’re just being you. When you feel lonely and abandoned you tend to say these melodramatically mournful things and latch onto anyone you can.”“You’re not just ‘anyone’. You’re My Dawn.”“And you’re My Ben.”I turned into the Raley’s parking lot, found a spot, and pulled in the van. Taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly, I turned off the engine and looked over at my best friend. “I’d like to meet Nick tonight, but if you have no interest, then of course we don’t have to.”“No, no. I’d actually love the chance to see him and Deedee again; I was just suspicious of your motives.” Dawn sighed. “If you want, I can text him right now, see if they’re available, and ask for their address.”I thought about that and shook my head in the negative. “Actually, why don’t you call him? Much less impersonal than a text, and you’re not stuck waiting to find out if he actually received it or not. I’m sure Nick would love to hear your voice; I know I would. Meantime, I’ll.
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