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4. Mormon's do not recognize each other at Hooters or the Liquor Store.1 How do you turn a fox into an elephant?Marry It!2 What is the difference between a battery and a woman?A battery has a positive side.3 How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?Put a nipple on it.4 Why do women fake orgasms?Because they think men care.5 If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what haveyou done wrong?Made her chain too long.6 Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probablynever be able to support you.7 Why do women have smaller feet than men?It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closerto the kitchen sink.8 Why do men pass gas more than women?Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.9 If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling atthe front door, who do you let in first?The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him. The trucking company paid all the hospital bills but my precious angel was in for a long recovery period. I put all of my work on hold so I could look after my daughter in the hospital and then at home. We both missed her mother very much and we spent many tearful evenings comforting each other. Kim was not able to go right back to school so I arranged with the school to home school her in her subjects. I could afford to do this since the trucking company came through with a sizeable settlement to not have to go to court in a wrongful death lawsuit and suffer the bad publicity. As a result of all the time we spent together Kim and I grew much closer and developed a bond paralleled by none. We would do everything she was able to do together even including bodily hygiene.It started out that I would give her sponge baths while she was bed ridden. As she got more mobile I would lift her into the tub for a bath. A nice hot soak did wonders for healing her injuries. Once she was able to.
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