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But we chatted for hours.Out of the domineering role he played he was gentle caring and just very special.I of course couldn't tell him this ,I kept theses thoughts to myself ,I was so scared that he wouldn't want me if I told him .It was obvious we wanted different things when he told me he wanted to play with other people as well,and he wanted to do that with me.....I was gutted!i thought I had for filled everything that a man could wantb,I thought I would be enough.My head was all over the place,I told him straight away that wasn't what I wanted and I really could not share,to me sharing was an insult on me ,I wasn't good enough and the sex wasn't enough for him,I tried to play along ,even trying to agree to going to a club together,but it didn't happen I couldn't bring myself to play that game ....it was hurtful to me ,I truly did not understand .We met on occasions after that for sex and my god it was good and if you look in my vids you can see the sexual attraction between us .I. I went to her house that night and it was raining heavily. She started teaching me and we took dinner and she started teaching me again. It was around 10pm we almost finished our study and she told me she want to talk to me for a while and she asked why I was glancing at her like that? I was taken aback and I did not reply she came near to me held my hand and told not to worry and she will not tell anyone and neither she had not told anyone about that incident. But I was nervous which she noticed,She put off the light in that room and came and sat near me holding my hand. She asked whether I was attracted sexually to her or just looked like that? Whether I read any sex book? Whether I had seen any lady naked? I really sweated and was speechless. She told it is normal to have such feelings and I don’t have to worry but I should not lose interest in studies with such thoughts. And I should masturbate and relieve myself. She asked whether I masturbate and I told yes with much.
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