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Panic rose from my stomach and into my throat and I choked a little. I cradled the phone and got up to pace the floor. Should I call Him back? Should I wait? What if He read my hestitation as more than fear of the unknown? I picked up the phone. Did I have the authority to call Him?I dialed His number. I sat there in silence as the number of rings exceeded the automatic timing in my brain. He did not answer. I had carefully thought about this day and what it might bring and it never occured to me it would bring forth an uncertain ending. This was ending with a question mark instead of a period.I had to get outside. But I had relied on his permission for months now to train me to obey. I had broken more than one rule today. I hestitated. That was one. I called Him without permission. That was two. Was he done with me or would he punish me severely once I had signed the contract?Sleep didn't come easily. I tossed and turned. I stared at the phone, willing it to ring. I wanted to obey.. Besides, she was moving out of town in a few days, and I didn’t want to start anything. Damn, I was going to miss her.I’d agreed to help her move and the day of loading the truck I was under her sink, removing the water filter she had installed. I did something wrong, no idea what, but in an hour or so, my left side began hurting something awful. Bruised or cracked rib from lying on the edge under the counter? I knew I wasn’t in the greatest shape at sixty-five anymore, but shit, I should be able to do that still. Fortunately, she’d hired movers to load the truck and the filter removal was the last thing to do that day, so we went to bed, she in her bedroom, me on a camping mattress in the living room. I was surprised I got as much sleep as I did. Every time I moved, the pain woke me.The next day she fixed a breakfast of eggs and fake bacon (she didn’t eat meat), did the dishes, stuck it all into the last box out, and off we went, she in her car and me driving the truck. .
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