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"She took out a pen and noted down her mobile number on the cafe loyalty card, smiled and left.I picked up the card and rubbed my thumb over the number, watching her go across the road, unable to take my eyes from the feminine shape of her hips and legs. She had a very ladylike way of moving her bottom that quite fascinated me and I suppose to me she was like a princess, all white and pure like a snowdrop in early spring.I didn't know for certain if I was in love with her. But I suppose she made me feel good and I fancied her like hell. I tried in vain to masturbate my lust away but it was ultimately frustrating. A pressure built up in behind my forehead and seemed to expand and make me desperate for release. I called her a few days later when I could bear it no more. She did not know who it was at first and I was inarticulate, bungled it and hung up. But she called back, no doubt aware of the dangers in her profession of not following up on one of her cases. I pulled myself together. “Hey, that’s great sweetheart, alright, I bet you I can be undressed and on the bed before you can spell GROOM.”So she spells “G - R - Ohhh - Ohhh - Mmmmm.”This one is compliments of John A. it may be a repeatTHE DUCK AND THE LAWYERA big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, “I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I’m going to retrieve it.” The old farmer replied, “This is my property, and you are not coming over here.” The indignant lawyer said, “I am one of the best trial attorneys in New Zealand and, if you don’t let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything you own.” The old farmer smiled and said, “Apparently, you don’t know how we settle disputes in North Wairarapa. We settle small disagreements like this with the.
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