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I looked at it with hatred and hit the green key.'Alex?' Her voice was high and panicky. 'Alex, is that you?''Of course it's me. What the hell's the matter?''Alex, we're in a taxi and a man came to my flat and... ' Her voice was rising hysterically. What the fuck? I turned on the bedside-light and tried to think.'You'd better get yourself down here and we'll sort it out, whatever it is. Tell the driver 'Hostal del Rocío', Calle Atocha.' I winced as I heard the syrup in my voice. Madrid's Obadiah Slope. I tottered into the bathroom, stuck my head into the shower-stall, then rough-dried my hair and ran a comb through it. Vain bastard, but otherwise I'd look like a devilishly handsome Struwelpeter. Tee-shirt and jeans, espadrilles, phone and wallet, keys: I headed for the door.A taxi stood outside the building, half on the pavement. I bent down and looked.'Hello, darlings, I'm so glad you're here, ' I carolled. As Pilar scrambled out and turned to help Elena I stuck a twenty-euro note. “It’s not cheating. He has ... a rare sexual condition, one that requires him to get sloppy seconds in order to get it up. He would just rather get them from me than some dude that he doesn’t know. Yes, there’s a decent chance that his girlfriend, Neda, will be knocked up by me, but also a chance for him. Being a good brother, how could I refuse? Besides, Neda’s a real cutie, one of the few women as sexy as you, and believe me, that’s saying a lot,” I explained to my ex, who raised her eyebrows at what she just heard.“Wow ... you really rate me that high? Why did you divorce me, then? As to the other stuff, I’m not too shocked. Scott has Mormon hang-ups written all over him. Such an abnormal reaction to repressed urges is not too surprising at all,” Carmen commented as she stole a French fry from me.“You know why we divorced, Carmen. You cheated, I had a revenge fling, you got angry and kicked me out, then you tried to delay the divorce with counseling, and I was pretty pissed, so I.
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