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”Cindy closed the laptop and tilted her head. “So, what happened to you?”Tom sighed. “Like I said, this was before the internet and DVD players. Porn was more artsy back then. As time went by things changed, I didn’t get as much work but kept on spending my money. One day I was broke. I tried to get into the newer stuff but no one wanted a thirty plus guy.”“What about a regular job?”“No education, and a no one want’s to employee an ex-porn actor. Not a resume to be proud off. I did get some work, mostly fast food restaurants, bar tendering and such, but nothing that stuck.”“Still, you had income, no reason to end up on the streets.”“I know, but back then I did drink and that’s how I ended up like this. I used to clean myself up but over the years it has become harder and harder.”They sat in silence for a while then Cindy asked. “Out of curiosity, what’s it like to fuck in front of a camera crew? Isn’t it hard with everyone staring at you?”“It was, in the beginning I was very nervous. "She looked out the window. "Sweetheart, if you could understand how hard it is sometimes..."I put a hand on her back. "I'm sorry, I didn't know. People just aren't used to it, that's all." You'd think after twenty bloody years they would be!" Well, maybe you could explain..."She cut me off: "The only explanation anyone needs is that I wasn't born here but I've done my best to fit in. That's all anyone needs to know."I dropped it -- I knew her early life was off-limits. We hugged and I went upstairs to change. It was strange that she never talked about her past, always saying it didn't matter, that the here and now was more important. It was a mystery I had lived with all my life.Anyway, back to my story... Some days she would head out on her own, leaving me alone at lunch or after school to deal with my increasingly sex-obsessed thoughts of her. I'd steal into her bedroom, open each drawer of her lingerie cabinet and run my fingers over the brassieres, panties and stockings to feel.
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