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"It matters, boyo, it matters. See, if you get any of your wishes wrong,if you don't meet the conditions, you don't get any of them. So payattention. And I don't mean pay attention like you do at school where younod along while I'm talking, I mean pay attention like you have to listenif you want to get any wishes."Darren nodded and listened."You must make all three wishes before I grant any of them. Each wishmust contain a comparison; greater, less than, same as, I don't care. Ican grant the wish by changing either side of the comparison."Kevin looked confused, so Kazam clarified, "OK, let's say you wish youhad as much money as Bill Gates. I can do that by having you come intobillions, or Mr. Microsoft can meet a sudden disaster and his bankaccount will be equal to yours. Got it now?"He nodded. The crowd outside was still chanting about justice andvengeance, but if he could make the right wishes they'd soon stop.---Darren thought.He wanted to wish that Sally would tell the truth, or. Nervous is okay, mom said. I’m just not allowed to be embarrassed. Yeah, I’m definitely nervous as hell!My mom is a total fox. Dad says it’s his job to keep her fit and slim. I don’t know if that’s really true but I’ve heard him tell her she will have to run five miles if she really wanted that piece of cheesecake she was considering. So you know what? Maybe he does really help her out like that!Everyone at school thinks my mom’s a total MILF and stuff, too. Sometimes it’s hard to pretend to get mad at my buddies for saying shit like that. I mean it’s expected to get defensive, but they’re absolutely right, too.I just read over what I wrote and there’s a lot of repeat words but still no explanation of the tradition or what the present mom gives me will be. That’s just because I’m still really nervous. I keep thinking things that freak me out. What if it doesn’t work tomorrow? My junk, I mean. What if I can’t get a boner when I NEED to? But my mom. She’s like totally hot so Ijust have.
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