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During those days my life and Sarah's life had been turned upside down and I was on an emotional roller coaster. I hated Sarah and I loved Sarah. I was also nagged by guilt for not doing more to get her into treatment. She had resisted all my attempts to even discuss it and of course as our marriage spiraled downward the hostility and absence of real affection took its toll. I consider myself a smart guy but when you are in a failing relationship it chips away at your soul and soon you find yourself trying not to care or simply deluding yourself that the other person will one day miraculously return to the loving caring person you used to be married to. With Sarah that was not to be. I knew something was wrong but recognizing the fact that she was clinically depressed was beyond me. And the fact she was finding solace in alcohol, drugs and risky sexual behavior was beyond anything I could imagine.On top of that I discovered afterwards that Sarah had become incredibly jealous of my. The car was built to drive, and Nick intended to drive it. Down the Pacific Coast Highway. At night. He intended to drive it as fast as he could. He wanted to see what the car could do. Everyone told him that he would definitely wreck the car, and probably kill himself in the process. Bullshit, he fucking knew how to drive.Finally, content to start, he put on a CD, and shifted into first, gently easing off the clutch and taking off with a lurch, despite his best efforts to do it as smoothly as he could. He eased the car onto the highway, turning the huge, heavy, unassisted steering wheel with great effort, and started off down the road.Music came out of his newly installed speakers, a soft ballad that seemed appropriate, considering his relationship with the car. The woman's voice was soft and gentle; it belonged to the grandmother of one of his friends. It had been recorded around the time this car was built.You dream a while ... and then you smile ... mmmmm so tempting... So.
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