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And yes, I’m the progeny of lesbians.”“I love lesbians.”“Eh.”“No, I don’t mean in the guy sense. I mean, I just have this thing about lesbians. It’s completely non-sexual.”Hox took the tequila back and drained it for another three seconds. There wasn’t much left anymore. “That’s a little awkward. River?”“Yeah?”“No. River? As in, what kind of name is River?”River grabbed the tequila and finished it, shoving the lime in his mouth immediately afterwards before answering, “My parents were hippies. They’re both pretty straight laced now, but they held on to a healthy disdain for the man and his normal names.”“Nice. Now, I’m only asking this because it’s the question that’s always asked, but...”“Um...” River’s heartbeat doubled.Hox picked up his solo cup and started nursing it again. “What are you doing next year?”Let down. He realized he’d way read too far into the half-second pause. “I wasn’t good enough to get recruited anywhere crazy, but I’m headin’ off to Vassar in. What do you seem to love is the fine Texas chili, I have to say, but that’s gonna cost ya. There’s no such thing as a free lunch, after all, is there?” Uncle Manfred chuckled now, even as Aunt Wendy grew increasingly dizzy, just moments after her own sister spaced out.“What did you put in this ... chili?” Wendy slurred her speech now, even as she heard Kelly giggle uncontrollably.“Just a little love,” I smirked as I entered the room now.“Simon?” Mom recognized me in spite of her drugged state, while Aunt Wendy was more than a little slow to react to my presence.“That’s the name you gave me, isn’t it? Don’t worry. You have a new home. The bad news is that both of you now live under my roof, which means putting up with and obeying MY RULES! Simon Says that you are both to sell your places or discontinue your leases and move in with us!“Simon Says that you are both to gather all of your clothes into bags based upon their utility, too. Simon Says that both of you will burn which bags I.
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