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.There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.'The priest said, 'Confess your sins and be forgiven.'The young woman said, 'Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.'The priest thought long and hard and then said,'Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.'The young woman asked, 'Will this cleanse me of my sins?The priest said, 'No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face.'This one is compliments of RrroscoA salesman drove into a small town where a circus was in progress. A sign read: "Don't miss Jock TheAmazing Scotsman".The salesman bought a ticket and sat down.There, on centre stage, was a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it was an old Scotsman.Suddenly the old man lifted his kilt, whipped out a huge willy and smashed all three walnuts with three mighty swings!The crowd erupted in applause as the elderly Scot was carried. ”He bit his lip.I frowned. “What?”“Would you...like to go see a movie next Saturday? I got a car for my birthday and...”I blinked in utter shock. “You want to...date me?”“I know,” he groaned. “Why would you want to date me? I'm the President of the Math Club.”“No, no,” I said. “I just... Why would you want to date...me? I'm a whore.”“You are,” he said. “And...” His cheeks grew pink.“And you find that hot,” I said, blinking in realization “You like watching me with other guys. Seeing me writhe on their cocks and cumming like a slut.”“I guess. I just...thought it would be fun. Sorry, it was stupid.”“No,” I said, grabbing him as he tried to rise, still more than a little shocked that he wanted to date me. “No, no, it sounds fun. Next Saturday. It can't be a Friday. I dance here at the club every Friday.” I leaned in to whisper in his ear. “For $10, I give guys a lap dance. They always cum hard. And since you're my boyfriend, I'll give you a discount. $5.”“Boyfriend?”“Well, you're asking.
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