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Flushed. Cochineal.Suffused. Bloodied.My wife can come up a hundred words to describe the violent shade of fiery red that is my burning buttocks, but I only need one: painful.It started a few weeks ago when I was signed up for a silly Internet game –The Race to 2,000 Spanks. My wife saw it and signed "us" up, thinking it would be excellent way to break in our new spanking paddles that my crazy sister-in-law bought us as a wedding present six months previous - "just to keep him in check," she drunkenly teased at the ceremony and gave a sly look to her husband grinning next to her, as the unwanted gifts left her possession.They had, of course, barely been used, but my wife kept thinking of reasons to want to try them out and I always refused: how many husbands would want their bare bottom bloodied by an overeager spouse? I was not a little child, and I didn't need treating like one. Her insistence and pleading over the paddles was always directly after she had met her sister for a. Diggs estate. I could see the armed guards just up the road at a guard shack. I pulled over, like I was trying to take a picture of the canyon on the other side of the road. I reached into the cage, dragged the monster out spitting and hissing and snapped a collar around its neck. Then, when the guards weren’t looking, I heaved it over the wall. The thump on the other side was satisfying and the laptop on the passenger seat told me that I had an instant, very hard connection to the little device that I had hung around its neck.That device is one of my little inventions and it reads and bounces all of the 2.4 Gigahertz 802 signals to an external repeater. It has a GPS built into it and a Wireshark protocol analyzer. It will ping and acquire any wireless router that comes into its range. I had assumed that the first place the cat would visit would be the Diggs mansion since I had tossed it into HIS back yard. and I was hoping that my war-kitty had already acquired Mr. Diggs’s Wi-Fi.
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