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When I mocked the pirouette during training, the penalty was anice cold shower after class, followed by a painful whipping with the acane. It was clear from the start, in every class that Charlie and Iattended that there would be no nonsense. We were there to learn andlearn we did. Obedience was indeed the rule. Deliberate errors weremet with severe punishment. I received a heart tattoo on my ankle forone offense, a pink butterfly on my shoulder blade for another and arainbow tattoo just above my buttocks for a third. Errors during honestattempts were met with encouraging remarks and additional repetitions.At first to avoid punishments, and later to earn praise, Charlie and Ibegan to put forth our best efforts to learn ballet. As unnatural as itseemed to us, our overwhelming desire eventually became to please theladies and avoid pain. Progress was rewarded. Lack of progress waspunished with increasing severity. It was a classical case ofconditioning.Charlie and I eventually. . I had seen them, on more than one occasion. Nudity had never been a major issue in our house growing up. Mom refused to let the situation with Jack turn sexuality, pleasure, and the rest of that into something less than what it was really meant to be. She didn't openly parade around in the buff or anything, but if either Kathy or I happened in on her while she was dressing, or undressing, she didn't exactly shoo us out of the room either. She always went about her business as though we weren't even there, never making it a big deal, though it very often for me ... became a big deal, later ... in the privacy of my bedroom as I lay there on my bed jerking off, with whatever new images, thoughts ... or fantasies I now had regarding her. Another reason I felt like such a shit for doing so. If mom ever found out how I felt, she'd no doubt find the way to take the blame for it herself, looking back, wishing she'd never been the way she'd been with us growing up. And that was the last.
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