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Please see a councelor.’ I’ll be back to pick up the rest of my stuff this weekend.’ She was still lying naked on the bed, her face expressionless, when I left and went to a motel. The next day I contacted a lawyer that was recommended to me by one of my work colleagues and went to see him. I told him what I wanted and he told me that without children it would be a simple divorce if both parties agreed. I asked him to proceed with the assumption it would be uncontested. I returned to work but I couldn’t concentrate. I kept seeing Anne with the guy in bed together and once I had to rush to the toilet to upchuck my lunch. I felt as devastated as when we’d lost Justin. I continued to live at the hotel on a weekly basis and eating in restaurants. It was lonely but it gave me time to think and I hoped it would do the same for her. I called our parents and let them know we were separated. I especially asked her parents to look in on her and make sure she was alright after explaining what. Though I felt like I was being awkward and an embarrassment in some of the things I said. However, once another co-worker showed up for their shift, I couldn't find the bravery to interact much with Heather further. At this point, I only had one hour left with Heather at work and I was struggling to come up with anything to talk about... We were just doing our jobs.After the end of her shift, I sent her a text apologizing for my awkwardness at work. She said she could tell that I was doing my best and not to worry. I mentioned that the working environment isn't a great place to converse; that I'm just plain bad at conversing. That Heather would have more fun and interest conversing with my other co-workers. She said that she gets along with everybody, but me because she knows everybody and has a form of contact except for me. In comparison, that day was awesome to her. That I smiled, that I made her day better, that she saw my efforts as a lot more good than bad. I refused to believe.
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