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”“She told me that she’s now been able to pay off her mortgage, but sure would like a Jaguar and a couple of Escalades. She wanted me to ask if she could bring Nelly and Kelly in and let them be serving wenches.”“Why doesn’t Big Joe do the asking? She’s his wife.”“I heard he was still laid up from last week when Gloria saw him doing his community service.”“Ok. Let’s see a show of hands to allow Nelly and Kelly to audition as serving wenches. However, that order for more aprons still hasn’t showed up yet.”Bang, bang, bang went the gavel but I don’t know whether anybody heard it over the whistles and cheers from the crowd. Apparently someone recognized Nelly and Kelly from last week’s DVD treat.“Motion passed. Feel free to bring your girls with you next week, Gloria.”When the clamor died down a bit, I asked again about old business.Old Jeb was up again, waving like he was trying to keep flies off of his head.“What is it this time, Jeb?”“We need to get somebody to make about a thousand. If it wasn't for all my training, I would be falling apart right now. I glanced at my co-pilot, and she was as pale-faced as I felt.I keyed up the PA, "We're heading to Anchorage for an emergency landing. It's twenty minutes out; we may be ditching in the ocean."Things went relatively smooth for the next ten minutes. My heart never once stopped hammering as my eyes kept checking the PFD and EICAS panels every second. I had the yoke in a death grip, fighting to keep the plane leveled. There was a loud, shuddering clunk and then the warning lights started flashing—fire in engine one. Lydia quickly pulled the fire extinguisher and feathered the engine. I couldn't take my hands off the yoke, or we'd pitch down into the ocean.The last engine whined, damaged by those fucking gremlins, and we slowed down. The whine seemed to grow worse and worse; the intake fan blades must have been damaged. Maybe a piece of the wing had been sucked inside. Ahead, the coast of Alaska grew larger and larger,.
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