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”“But you don’t know what it’s like bro! All that pussy! It does tend to distract you.”“If it helps,” Sarosa interrupted. “I did ask him to get you laid and he told me to shut up.”“Shut up Sarosa! You’re in enough trouble already!” Harry shouted.“You know, if we’re complaining about the things Harry did and didn’t do,” Charlie said. “I’d like to object to all those girls you forced to have sex with you, since I’m assuming they came by the bucketload.”“Oh you’re one to talk,” Sarosa said, squaring up to Charlie. “I bet you hardly stuck by the letter of the law and morals last night.”“I hope you’re not comparing me to him.”“You didn’t do one bit of mind control on him then? Didn’t do anything to him without his consent?”“Well...“I thought so. Hey Africa, what did Charlotte here wish for?”“Her first wish was for “really big boobs”, followed by a series of wishes to make her body “perfect”. She then wished for an arousing voice, and she wished for Daniel’s mother to bring him over. (I'm still on his Christmas card list and he recently sent me signed copy of his latest true-crime book.) The local rag printed a rumor that numerous bodies of children had been found on my property. Their retraction the next week was printed at the bottom of page of page six, right next to the garage sale notices. Judge Moonbat held another kooky press conference and orders the FBI back to look some more searching, even bulldoze up my entire property, if necessary. They do — and find nothing. A pathetic couple from Indiana with a missing eight year old daughter named Sue shows up at my house and holds a gun to head for three hours until the local Sheriff and the FBI convince the poor bereaved couple that I don't have their missing girl in a shallow grave in my pasture. That might have been the saddest day of my entire life. The County Judge orders everyone to go home and stay there. The local rag prints a vague story that the "on-going investigation" against me has taken a temporary.
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