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Master barely let me out of bed for the first week, and I really was pretty sick then anyway.It seemed a long time before the doctor finally pronounced me healthy again, although he seemed somewhat doubtful. Not about my body, which he said was remarkable, but more over my mind, I suppose. He also found that remarkable, but not in an admirable way, not like he appreciated my body. He didn't understand why I would want to live the way I did, nor did he appreciate my piercings, especially the ring in my pubis, although he could find no flaw with it. All my piercings had healed perfectly, the way my body was recovering quickly and almost effortlessly from the infection in my lungs and the deep cuts along my sides.I was even regaining weight as my appetite had returned with a vengeance. I felt fat and lazy by the time the doctor paid his final visit and I was anxious to get back to my own room and exercise with my brothers. The days were growing warmer and I missed the sun and my morning. ”I sunk down in my seat a little, sincerely feeling depressed just thinking about it. “Yeah, it was honestly really traumatizing. I still have nightmares about it, even after all these years. It’s so bad sometimes, I’ll wake up transformed.”“You know it’s not your fault, right?” she said quickly. “There was nothing you could have done to save her. I mean, you were only nine years old!”I nodded weakly. Of course, I knew she was right, but it didn’t help the guilt much, especially now that the memory was fresh in my mind again. However, discovering that the baby survived did help. A lot. I supposed even though I felt like I failed, I technically didn’t.A life existed today thanks to me.Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly. “Well, the good thing is, Nick doesn’t know for sure it’s me. And as long as I stop, like you mentioned earlier on our way back from the mall, then it will end up as a closed case.” I sighed. “It’s just…”“Hard to stop,” she finished for me.It wasn’t a.
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