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Upon her return, the chicken ties a rope around the bumper and tosses the other end of the rope to the horse. As the horse bites down on the rope and hangs on for dear life, the chicken drives the car forward and saves the horse from sinking.A few days later, the chicken and horse are playing in the meadow again. This time, the chicken falls into the mud hole. The chicken yells to the horse to run and get the farmer, or the farmer's Mercedes.The horse says, "Wait, I think I can stand over the mud hole!" So, he stretches over the width of the hole and says to the chicken, "Reach up and grab my 'thingy' and pull yourself up!!!" And so the chicken did, pulling herself up to safety.The Moral of the Story?If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.For those who already have children past this age ... this is hilariousFor those who have children this age ... this is not so funnyFor those who have children nearing this age ... this is a warningFor those who have. [/b I had just bathed and climbed into bed. I was sl**ping nude that night, and had my sex toys out for a bit of self time for myself, when my phone rang. It was a friend of my fathers, asking if I could drive out and pick them up, they were too d***k to drive, and it was daddy’s car they were in. I angrily climbed out of bed and climbed into a loose fitting frock, this was going to be a quick pick-up and drop off, so I dispensed with the need to put any underwear on, and set off in the direction of the pub, where they waited. As I drove I suddenly became acutely aware of how just nude I was, and at s*******n, how firm my breasts felt, and how wet I felt. By the time I arrived my body was alive, and I could not resist touching my erectile tissue, and as I parked in the pubs car park, my hand was up my dress, rubbing my swollen clitoris. I was on the verge of an explosive orgasm when the there was a loud bang on the car roof, and the passenger door swung open, catching me withdrawing.
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