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..Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: ‘Slim, I’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches and pains. I know you’re about my age. How do you feel?’ Slim says, ‘I feel just like a newborn baby.’ ‘Really!? Like a newborn baby!?’ ‘Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.’A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: ‘So I hear you’re getting married?’ ‘Yep!’ ‘Do I know her?’ ‘Nope!’ ‘This woman, is she good looking?’ ‘Not really.’ ‘Is she a good cook?’ ‘Naw, she can’t cook too well.’ ‘Does she have lots of money?’ ‘Nope! Poor as a church mouse.’‘Well, then, is she good in bed?’ ‘I don’t know.’ ‘Why in the world do you want to marry her then?’ ‘Because she can still drive!’Three old guys are out walking. First one says, ‘Windy, isn’t it?’Second one says, ‘No, it’s Thursday!’ Third one says, ‘So am I. Let’s go get a beer... ‘A man was telling his neighbour, ‘I just bought a new. I opened the door and got in. He didn't say a word as we drove home. I cried quietly hoping Daddy wouldn't be too mad.When we got home I was sent to my room again. This time Daddy came marching up the steps before I had even had time to sit down and collect my thoughts. His big heavy boots sounded like thunder in the stairwell. He opened the door and looked at me in a way he never had before. I turned my eyes away ashamed."When are you going to learn?" He yelled storming into the room. I cowered before him whimpering. He put his hand on my chin and lifted it up looking at my face. "Baby you can't trust boys. They will fuck it up every time."He sat on the bed and pulled me over his lap again. "No Daddy! Please! He smacked my bottom. "Daddy, no." He smacked me again. He pulled my skirt up and freaked when he saw my ripped panties."Did he fuck you?" Did he?" he yelled."No Daddy! I got up and walked out, he was too rough." Was he?" He smacked me again and then spread my legs pulling at.
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