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It’s almost all too much to bear.As I draw near in a dreamlike state, he opens his arms wide, encouraging me closer. There’s an undeniable rising attraction between us; a kind of animal magnetism fills the air. It surrounds us like a hunger feeding off our very souls -- a developing need -- craving release. I recognise it for what it is. Lust. Yet, even though he is a stranger and I don’t want this to stop, I find myself hesitating.A slow, wicked smile forms on his lips, as if willing me to step forward and succumb; to cross over from reality into fantasy with just one more step. Suddenly my mind’s a blur of doubt. I’m worried about revealing my true self. So many secrets I’d sworn to keep hidden deep within my subconscious, never to see the light of day again. Or so I thought. But as soon as these thoughts cross my mind I realise it’s too late. Nothing will hide this powerful force growing within me -- my inherent neediness -- from taking over. It’s part of who I am. My very being.. She cried a lot and Victor was not embarrassed but patiently allowed her to revisit her grief again and again and her acute sense of having been cheated out of their life together. He often held her in his arms as she sobbed, and she told him she felt comforted.It was on the seventh day that Victor spoke his own thoughts about her life, her feelings and her bereavement. He had listened and supported her, but felt that he could now push her a little.“Angela,” he ventured as she came to the end of another reminiscence about Neill, “It’s only six months since he died. What you are doing now is good. When you go home, warn your friends that you will be working through your grief by boring them with your stories about Neill, and then bore them! It will take quite a time for you to work through it.“This empty feeling will be with you for a long time, but believe me it will become less and less intense. There will always be a gap in your life into which Neill should have fitted, but you will.
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