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" And with that, he threw off his hat and wiped the sweat from his brow. Then he unbuttoned his jacket, showing me a glimpse of a big barrel chest and surprisingly muscular stomach all covered by curly white fur. "Damn, this outfit gets hot," he said winking at me. Was this rented Santa making a pass at me, or was I just horny? Who cared. What kind of a nut would turn down the chance to do Santa? I let my eyes drop to his crotch area. There was a huge amount of tenting action going on in the front of his trousers. Suddenly, it was like I was hypnotized. I watched as my hands reached out and undid the button on his pants, grabbed each side of the waist, and yanked them down around his ankles. The next thing I knew, I had his giant candy cane down my throat and my nose buried in the softest mound of pubic hair you can imagine. Santa really had a gorgeous piece of uncut meat. I'd guess it was about 10" long and covered with big popping veins. Just sucking on it almost made me blow a. Somewhere deep in the mountain was going to be a really big stinky pool filled with a lot of nitrates. Hmm. Good fertilizer.Going back to the plans of the retreat I noticed hidden, sealed pipes thruout the floors. They all led to a hypocaust, or boiler. Why, you ingenious little devils! The earth elementals had picked up on a concept going back to Roman times--heated floors. They even built a sauna next to the hypocaust, but I'd have to line it with wood. Hot stone and my ass don't mix.A few days later I was down to one tamale left. I looked at it, then thought about the mitosis or clone spell. I put two fingers on it, put myself in the right mind-set and pulled them apart. I now had two tamales. I sat up straight, my eyes opened up like saucers. This had far-reaching implications. I walked into the kitchen and stood before the meat locker. two fingers, pull apart and I had two meat lockers. Wow. I did the same to the pantry. I checked to make sure that the spells replicated properly.
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