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”“I was talking about Jack,” said Dinah.“Jack? Who’s Jack?” asked the garp innocently.“Jack,” drawled Dinah, “is the little problem responsible for that,” said Dinah, pointing at Harmony’s chest.The garp looked down to see that one of her breasts was still protruding from the gown she had sought so quickly to rearrange.“Oops!” trilled the bewitched creature, fumbling at her bodice.“That and the fact that you’ve never played music like that since we bought you,” added Dinah, peering around. “Where is he? Come out, Jack. I know you’re there.”Jack peered out from under the magazine rack. He was all scrunched over, and his head was tilted sideways, so he couldn’t see very well, but he could tell that Mortimer wasn’t in the room, so he edged his way forward until his head popped out. Dinah’s swiveling head stopped as her eyes saw him.“Uh ... hi,” he said weakly.“Come out here, young man!” said Dinah, her voice tight. “We have much to discuss.”“We do?”There was nothing for it but to leave. When they asked why I wasn’t responding to the President on Twitter, he told them I wasn’t on Twitter. According to him, they just stared at him like he was speaking in tongues. I guess you’re not human if you don’t tweet.”Kelly laughed at that and patted my cheek condescendingly. “You’re just a caveman, Grim. Cute, but a caveman.”I gave my wife a leering smile. “Just how cute?”“Not that cute!”I laughed at her.Wednesday, things just kept getting sillier. Both Jack and I got a couple of tweets running us down. In my case, one stated,’ Hero Reaper no hero, refuses to respond to charges of being a bad soldier, bad cop!’ Chief Crowley told me that he had made a statement to CNN’s Anderson Cooper, basically stating my record as a police officer, trying to refute the claim I was a bad cop. He also told me that the County Council, paragons of virtue and civic courage, were asking him about the possibility of getting rid of me. Wonderful!When I got home, Kelly was on the phone, and she waved.
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