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Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department’s work and was so grateful that his farm had been spared, that right there on the spot he presented the volunteers with a check for $1,000. A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds. “That ought to be obvious,” he responded, wiping ashes off his coat. “The first thing we’re gonna do is get the Goddamned brakes fixed on our fire truck.THE IRATE CUSTOMERFor all of you out there who’ve had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. It’s a classic! In tribute to those ‘special’ customers we all love! An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo.A crowded United flight was cancelled. A single agent was rebooking a long line of inconvenienced travellers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the. Because I've got an alien mother, I'm really strong. I can lift hundredsof pounds like it's nothing. I can run as fast as a freight train. I canleap about an eighth of a mile. And mom says nothing short of a burstingshell can penetrate my skin. Pretty impressive, but nothing like mom, whocan fly into space, travel back and forth in time, melt things with heatbeams from her eyes and toss asteroids around like they're ping pongballs. It's amazing to have powers like that. I know. I know because fiveyears ago my mom and I swapped places. Literally. I was in her body andshe was in mine. It was all because of Red Kyptonite, or, as dad alwayscalls it, "crazy, unpredictable Red Kyrptonite."Anyway. I ought to back up a bit I guess. It was the end of June, 1966.Martha and I had both just finished sixth grade. We were all prettyexcited because we were taking a plane trip halfway across the country toGotham City, where mom's best friend, Lana Lang, was getting married toher boss, Bruce Wayne..
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