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I felt a bit bad on the cab ride home, I didn't want my lifeto be just self lust but it's pretty hard to ignore my circumstances.Maybe that will wear off in time, who knows.I got home and ignored my new undies and just ate and watched TV somemore. I think it was just a "settling in" night.If you could have seen me splayed out on the couch, scratching my snatchand watching TV you would laugh I bet..:)Sunday, March 11th, 2007I slept in today like a lazy slug.I'm not sure why I keep writing all of this, I guess maybe it's a fewmoments of connection to my old maleness that I really crave. This isthe only place anyone would "buy" my true guyness at the moment.I went to bed naked last night and DID NOT masturbate. I saw this as asuccessful experiment, I had some control still. This body is sowickedly soft and cozy on silk sheets, I slept like a baby.I tried a little experiment today. All day I kind of let myself go, I"pranced" around the house and used some more feminine mannerisms. Ispent. I started to unbutton the neck of her nightdress when she put her hand over mine. ‘What about the baby?’ she glanced at the wall that separated our room from the nursery and furrowed her brow at the prospect of waking our just barely asleep newborn. I cupped her chin in my hand, and pulled an exaggerated earnest face while putting my finger to my lips- we could be quiet. She smiled and and mocked an exasperated sigh- ‘Promise?’ I mimed locking my lips, and held out my little finger for a pinky promise. She chuckled quietly and accepted. ‘Well, alright.’ I needed no more permission. I took her face between my hands and kissed her deeply, we grabbed and pulled and nibbled each others lips as we quietly undressed each other. Off came her top, an oversized T-shirt of mine from highschool, and was soon followed by her blue pajama pant. She hooked her thumbs into my boxers and slid them down my legs, licking my already rock-hard organ as she passed. She straddled me as I sat on the edge.
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