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When you’re done, you will have a place to live.Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-60 year-old husband?A: Tell him you’re pregnant.Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?A: Take off your glasses.Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face?A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out... Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?A: Valets don’t forget where they park your car.Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?A: On their foreheads.Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?A: “Gosh, I remember these!”Great Quotes“There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal,. Most marriages founderon the same rocks – bad communications, children,outside interference, money, sex, bad communications,ridiculous expectations about money or sex, badcommunications, ridiculous disagreements about money orsex, etc. Ours had run aground on sex. In the beginning it had been okay, never reallysizzling, just okay, but over the years it gotdownright dull. We got busy with work and friends andother things and just lost each other. I found myselflooking at other women and fantasizing, but that’s allI did, because I loved Maura and didn’t want to cheaton her, even if the opportunity arose. That didn’t stopme from thinking about it, and finally I had to dosomething.It took a long time for me to confront Maura about myunhappiness. I told her just how I felt, and suggestedthat maybe if we made sex into more of a game, maybe ifshe would just dress and act a little sexier now andthen, things might improve. She turned me down cold.“I’m not.
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